I really...

want this. This is the biggest night of my life. I need this so, so, so much. You don't realise how much I want this. I'm gonna give it 110% No, 112% This is my moment, a moment like this doesn't come along very often. Not at all. This is my biggest dream and I just hope I can pull it off tonight. Because if I don't I'll do myself in. No messing. I'll jump off a bridge or something proper high like that. Onto some jagged rocks. And then while I lie there, in a pool of my own viscera, I'll know that I've missed my big opportunity to be the Amington Fete Rhubarb Gardener of the Year.