Losing my Religion

I've decided to convert. Up until now, I have been a strict Church of England man. Not that I ever went to church, except for weddings and such, but apart from that I was devout. I mean, come on, who wants to go to church these days? I went to Midnight Mass once, it lasted two hours. Wasn't it Jesus himself who said that 'brevity is the soul of wit?' What do you mean, no?

Anyway, I have decided to convert to Islam. I know, I know, they've got a bad reputation lately, what with all the suicide bombings and such, but I'm not scared of suicide bombers. In fact (snigger) I think they've been blown up out of all proportion! (snigger)

They didn't like that gag down at the mosque.

Anyway, the main reason I decided to convert was not especially spiritual, but because of what they call God: Allah. I just like how informal it is, how you can shorten it to Al.

I wouldn't mind a God called Al, because it makes Him seem less scary. and I don't think he'll mind much. In fact, wasn't it God Himself who said, 'You Can Call Me Al?'

What do you mean no?